Hope For The Future
by BeckyAdams
Summary: I did not like the way the Janny relationship ended so i decided to write my own version and share it with you all. This is all about where Jac and Jonny are headed and their hopes for the future.
1. Chapter 1

**So I decided that I did not like the ending between Jac and Jonny so just had to write my own. Anything in italics is thoughts as I think it would be nice for this one to be very driven by how the characters feel rather than me just writing a narrative. Having said that my plans always change as I go along! As of yet I am unsure how long this is going to be as it very much depends on my schedule and if you guys want me to carry on. Anyway enough of me rambling on! Hope you enjoy this and please review good or bad I am always up for a bit of constructive criticism.**

* * *

"You have got to tell him Jac, if he loves you he will forgive you"

Sean's words were still ringing in Jac's ear as she finished up her final set of ward rounds for the day. It had been a long shift and all Jac wanted to do was to go home and forget about everything with the aid of a glass of wine. After checking up on the last patient she headed for the staff room to get changed before embarking the lift. When he reached the ground floor she was hoping for a quick exit to the hospital, however fate had other plans. As the doors opened there stood Jonny smiling back at her. The young consultant couldn't help but beam. Jonny was the sweetest guy ever and by some miracle he had chosen her over everyone else.

_How could I have been so stupid? I have no feelings for Sean. Never have and never will. Jonny on the other hand is amazing and I could really see us together forever, well certainly a long time but I guess I have ruined that now. I should not have gone for a drink with Sean it was asking for trouble. I mean let's not forget when this happened with Joseph I pretended to be pregnant! The thing I regret the most though is hurting Jonny. This is going to be awful for him and he doesn't even know it yet. He has always been there for me, like today after surgery. He told me he was proud of me and it took everything not to break down right there and then. How can anybody be so supportive of an evil manipulative bitch like me? I don't deserve anyone especially him. Sean is right I need to tell him. I owe him that much at least, I could not bare it if he found out through the vicious circle of hospital gossip. I guess I always have hope that he will see that I regret it so much and give me another chance. Who am I…_

"Come on Miss Naylor, it's late and I'm starving. Time for dinner I think then hot sex in a place of your choice" Jac linked arms with Jonny as the headed out of the entrance and into the cold January air. Previously, Jac had always tried to keep her personal feelings and relationships out of the workplace but with Jonny it was different. She never thought twice about showing her affection for him. Especially now. This did not go unnoticed by Jonny who knew how private the ice queen liked to be and in the past few weeks it has given him confidence as he knew that Jac thought of him as very special indeed. They had come such a long way since the days of the car incidents where they had to wait in the car for each other to leave so as not to arrive on the ward together.

_I can't believe Jac doesn't mind telling people we are together now. It was so hard to keep it quiet from everyone, well not everyone. Mo has known for a while now but how could I not tell my best friend I am sleeping with her boss? Except it's much more than just sex now. Jac has this amazing personality that nobody ever sees. To truly understand Jac you need to first break down the barriers she builds around herself. I must have the patience of a saint, but boy has it been worth it. In some ways I am glad that I am the only one to know this side of her personality as it is something special to be kept just between us and that is what relationships should be about. Trust. It's a small word but without it you have nothing._

Jonny was pulled from his thoughts suddenly when Jac spoke.

"Listen Jonny, I really need to tell you something and it's very important"

"Can it not wait until later?"

"No" Jac could already feel the tears forming in her eyes. Jonny gave her a look which told her to continue.

"Did you really mean it when you said this was a fresh start for us?"

"Yes. From now on it's all about us and me being able to make you feel happy and loved every day"

"Then I need to tell you"

"Tell me what Jac?"

With her eyes stinging Jac was struggling to keep the tears from falling.

"I… I slept with Sean last night"

Jonny was stunned into silence. Of all the things going through his head in the moment's previously he had never considered that Jac had cheated on him. Let alone with a colleague and somebody whom he used to call a friend.

When Jonny didn't reply, Jac could no longer fight back the tears and they ran down her cheek in a gentle cascade.

"Please say something"

"Why? Jac, just why would you do this?"

"I don't know. It didn't mean anything"

"It obviously meant something to one of you"

"It just happened"

"But it shouldn't have just happened. I know we haven't had the best of times recently and I accept that I am partially to blame, but you cannot solve our problems by sleeping with another man. You should have come to me Jac and we could have talked. Am I not enough for you? Is that what you are saying?"

"No of course not, I just needed comfort and he was there"

"Jac I am the one who is meant to 'just be there' when you need me the most. I am your boyfriend, the one who is meant to be there comfort and protect you. I care about you so much, do you not trust me?"

"I do. Of course I do. It was a stupid mistake and I am so sorry for hurting you"

For the first time in her life Jac could remember actually considering someone else's feelings and apologising for upsetting somebody else through her own actions.

_I can tell from the look in her eyes that Jac regrets what she did. I have never heard her apologise to anybody for anything before so it's nice to finally here those words. But how can I forgive her? I really do want t. I know it was a silly mistake and we all make them from time to time. This mistake just happened to involve my girlfriend being taken to bed by another man. More than anything I cannot believe Sean did that to me. I am the one who cares about her; all he wanted was that attention for one night. I want to believe Jac won't do this again but look what happened with Lord Byrne. I need her to understand that she hurt me and that cannot keep forgiving her, but I don't want to lose her especially as I do not think she understands how much she means to me. Beneath that ice cold exterior she is one of the most amazing people I have ever met. What do I do?_

As if she could read his thoughts Jac continued.

"Sean never meant anything to me. I have hurt people in the past but never before have I felt so much regret as I do for hurting you. You see the thing I can really see us spending our lives together, we have a connection that I have never shared with anyone else. You know how hard I find it to connect with people. My mother left to go to India and told me that my granddad was dead and people wonder why I have trust issues. I want to have my own family someday but I have always been too scared until I met you. You showed me that I do care for others and I am not at all like my mum. I…"

Jonny knew right there and then what he needed to do to fix this whole mess. Slowly, he stepped towards Jac and to her complete surprise he planted a sweet kiss on her lips. Jac deepened this kiss realising that this was his cunning way of getting her to shut up but not wanting to waste what could be their last kiss. Jonny pulled Jac ever closer towards him until there was no air there at all. Jac suddenly stepped away.

"How can you kiss me knowing what I have done?"

"Because I needed you to be quiet for one minute so I can explain. I love you Jac Naylor and you should not have done what you did but I guess you already know that. The point is it's like I said: I want to forget everything that has happened in the past 48 hours and move on. I forgive you for what you did as I know you regret it. Besides I want to go out for dinner tonight with my beautiful girlfriend because she still owes me amazingly hot sex and I don't think I can wait much longer"

"Jonathon Maconie, you are the most amazing person I have ever met and I love you so much, I know I have never said it to you before but I mean it. You are so special and I cannot believe you would want to be with me"

"So are you Jac, I wouldn't forgive just anybody you know"

He rubbed her dampened cheek gently with his thumb, wiping away the remaining tears.

"Let's go, I am starving!"

Jonny removed his other hand from his pocket and took Jacs hand in his. They walked to the busy street outside the hospital and signalled to a cab which pulled over next to them. Jac and Jonny clambered in and to the driver to head straight to Jacs favourite Italian restaurant.

_I can't believe he has taken me back. Not that I am complaining! I had hoped that he would be able to forgive me in the future, but never thought he would be able to put it to one side so that we can go out tonight, but then that's what makes him so amazing and it's just one of the many reason why I love him so much. I am just glad that tonight I finally told him that. I had put it off for far too long. In truth there was a connection right from the beginning at the people skills course, if I believed in fate then this would certainly be one of those moments from a movie. _

Jac was brought back to earth when the taxi pulled up outside the restaurant. Once again Jonny took and hand and paid the driver before leading them both into the foyer.

"Table for 2 please"

"Step right this way sir" said the helpful young waitress.

"Is this table ok for you?"

"Yes, it's great thanks"

Jac and Jonny were seated towards the back of the restaurant where it was a little quieter. This is what they preferred as it gave them time to talk and especially after today they were going to need that special time together.

Once they had placed their orders the waitress brought a bottle of red wine and 2 glasses to the table.

"Thank you" said Jonny as the young woman poured out the first of many glasses that were to be consumed that evening.

As she walked away Jonny raised his glass, noticing this Jac did the same.

"I would like to propose a toast. Here is to new beginnings, and no more secrets"

Unable to find the words to express her feeling Jac simply nodded before taking a sip from her glass. She placed the glass on the table and smiled at Jonny who was staring at her by this point.

"You look so beautiful tonight Jac, practically glowing"

"That is 2 people in one day; do I really need to go on a diet that badly?"

Jonny looked puzzled by this comment so Jac continued.

"Only fat or pregnant people glow, and no I am not pregnant"

"Would you like to have kids?"

Jac sniggered at this comment before realizing that Jonny was being deadly serious. "I'm not exactly mother material am I?"

"What makes you say that? I saw the way you were with Freya. I have never seen you love someone so much as you did with her. Not even me!"

"If my mum was able to just walk away what makes you think I will not do the same?"

"You are not your mother Jac. And anyway I would not let you walk away from our child"

Their conversation was cut short by the arrival of the main course. The food was amazing, like it always was here. That was why it was Jacs favourite. Unfortunately for Jonny it always came at a price, he fault he supposed for picking a girlfriend with expensive taste. The rest of the meal was eaten it silence, but it was not an uncomfortable silence, they just enjoyed being in each other's company and neither had to say anything to acknowledge the presence of the other.

Once they had finished the meal the bill was brought to the table and Jonny settled up the balance.

"Next time it's Burger King Ms Naylor I am only on a nurses salary remember"

"I don't mind where I eat as long as I am with you"

"Don't you dare go all soft on me!"

"I wouldn't dream of it"

* * *

As the restaurant was only a short walk from Jac's flat they decided it would be easier and actually far cheaper to walk home. As the exited the door, the cold winter air hit them. It made for a very bracing walk and Jac could not find her keys fast enough when they arrived back at her place a short while later.

_I have been here so many times before. Why do I still get butterflies going into my girlfriend's house? Pull yourself together Maconie._

"Would you like a drink?"

"Better be coffee as there is this female consultant on my ward who will go ape if I turn up hangover tomorrow"

"Well I understand her point, can't have the patients in danger now can we"

"Wise words Ms Naylor, wise words"

Jac poured two coffees into the mugs on the side before carry thing them into the living room where Jonny was now seated.

"Why all the talk about kids earlier?"

"I would like a family one day"

"Not now though"

"Maybe not straight away but I have always wanted to be a dad"

They sat talking for hours until they suddenly realised the time.

"It's 2am. I really think we should be getting to bed"

"What happened to the other part of the deal?" Jonny said with a wink.

"Looks like you are going to have to wait a little bit longer then. Patience is a virtue"

_Why did she have to do this to me? All I could think about all day was spending 'quality time' with Jac and now she is putting me off again. If I didn't know better I would say she wasn't interested._

"Come on then sleepy let's get you to bed. You are going to need all your sleep for tomorrow_"_

One behind the other, they walked up the stairs into Jac's bedroom; she got straight into bed while Jonny went into the bathroom. When he returned moments later Jac was already fast asleep. Even with her hair messy and all over the place she still looked stunning. He climbed into the other side of the bed and gently wove his arm around her before placing a light kiss on her head.

"Goodnight Ms Naylor, I love you and one day I will prove to you that you can be maternal with our kids"

Unbeknown to Jonny, Jac had heard every word and couldn't help but smile. He had forgiven her and now it was her turn to reward him with what he wanted. A family.

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**There we are. Officially the longest chapter I have ever written and I hope you guys enjoyed it. If you would like another chapter please let me know but until next time, thanks for reading. Becky xx**


	2. Chapter 2

**Once again thank you guys for sticking with me. I find it hard to check my own work for spelling and grammar errors so i apologise if they still appear. I am loving writing for Jac but the scriptwriters do such a fantastic job it's a hard act to follow! I am also not going to make this an easy ride for the two of them, so I hope none of you Janny fans end up hating me for some of the later chapters! Anyway hope you guys are enjoying this. As before anything in italics is thoughts.**

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Jac woke up before her alarm to find Jonny still with his arms wrapped around her.

_How is it already 7am? I could happily stay her with this amazing man for the rest of my life. Part of me can't quite believe I ever slept with a nurse once let alone actually formed a relationship with him! But I wouldn't change Jonny for the world._

Jonny was woken by the alarm a few minutes later. He wriggled slightly before realising that he couldn't feel his left arm. Jac had clearly rolled over in the night to be held in his arms, but in the process had cut of the blood supply to one of them. Jac realising, what he was moaning about, quickly slid to one side allowing Jonny's arm to be freed. Now much more comfortable, Jonny pulled Jac back into his arms and placed light kisses in her hair.

"Well how are you this feeling on this fine morning Miss Naylor"

"Seriously!" Jac groaned

"What?"

"How are you this awake at 7am?"

"I am like a Duracell bunny, ready and raring to go"

"Funny" Jac retaliated sarcastically before being able to hold back a sweet giggle.

"Hang on, did Jac Naylor just laugh? At something I said?" "Come on, admit it. You find my funny!"

"You are hilarious, are you happy now?"

"You have no idea"

"Don't you need to get up Jonny, can't be late or your bitch of a boss will have a go at you again"

"I never said she was a bitch!" he said rolling over a placing his lips to hers. "She has certainly been a lot nicer to me recently, some say it's because she has an amazing new boyfriend"

"I've been nice?! Well that's going to have to change; people will think I am going soft"

"Being nice to people isn't a bad thing Jac. I find I am the only one to know this side of you, the relaxed happy Jac, not Jac the ice-queen cardiothoracic consultant"

"But people don't like me"

"That's because they do not know the real you like I do"

"Past experience"

"Come on Jac you cannot play that game with me! I was in care too"

"You cannot compare the two. My mother left me and moved to India and told me my granddad was dead"

"That does not been I don't understand what you went through, we are more alike than you think"

"You just don't understand nobody ever has, that is how I ended up in care!" Jac muttered as she walked off to take a shower.

* * *

_How could she think that I don't understand? We are more similar than Jac would like to think or ever admit to herself. I know exactly how the care system works. The constant feeling of not being enough for someone and that just being you means that you are unwanted. The joy of thinking someone has taken you from all this madness only to be let down again by yet another family and be back to square one, in a home with 20 other unwanted children who nobody cares for._

All these thoughts were running through Jonny's mind as he lay on the bed starring up at the ceiling. Jac had stormed off to take a shower and he didn't really see the need to get up. Before he knew it 7:20. He decided he better get up and make some breakfast for Jac and himself. Their relationship had not been the smoothest, no relationship ever is, but Jonny knew that this could not go on and the air needed to be cleared before work if there was any hope of keeping their personal problems off the ward. In an effort to build bridges the Scottish nurse grabbed some eggs and bacon before filling the kettle and flicking the switch.

Meanwhile Jac was taking a long hot shower. She had always done this as her method of washing away all the troubles and forgetting that the rest of the world around her existed. For as long as she could remember it had been like this: her sanctuary where she could not be judged.

_He doesn't understand me at all! Nobody ever has. He likes to think he does. Truth is I am just a waste of space and I knew this from the moment my own mother didn't even want to be a part of my life. I don't know of any other mother who would go to the effort of moving to the other side of the world just to avoid having their daughter in their life. I want him to understand I really do. I was always told as a child that talking to someone would help but psychologists are a waste of time. Jonny is the only person who I would talk to but I do not find it easy to just tell people how I feel. _

Jac shut off the water and pulled on her favourite dressing gown. From the top of the stairs she could smell the bacon that Jonny had clearly been making while she was in the bathroom. Jac continued on her path towards the kitchen being careful not to trip over the mass of post at the bottom. She collected the bundle and slowly pushed open the kitchen door to reveal Jonny with plates of breakfast sat at the counter.

"Breakfast is served"

"You did this for me?"

"Well I can't eat all of this by myself can I?!"

_How can he be so nice to me? I am a bitch, everybody knows it. _

Jac's conscience took over, as if her personality and what she knew was right were in conflict.

_Jac you need to realise what is right in front of you. Of course he may not completely understand but he wants to. For the first time in your life someone has cared enough to think about how you feel and try to work you out. _

"I'm sorry"

Jonny was shocked. "Wait, I didn't quite catch that; you will need to repeat it"

"You heard me Jonathon"

They both laughed in unison.

"So am I forgiven for being a bitch again?"

"Of course. How could I not forgive you? But I do wish you would tell me what really goes through that head of yours. I want to understand you and what makes you tick"

"Nobody has ever taken such an interest in my life before; I just find it hard to express my feeling to other people. I have always been judged in the past"

"You know you can tell me anything, I will not judge you."

"So what would you like to know?"

"Anything and everything about you, start from the beginning"

"Ok, so Jacqueline Marie Naylor age 35. I grew with my mum in an albeit dysfunctional family until I was 12. Looking back on it now we may not have been the typical family but for the most part I assumed what we had was normal. My mum was not the best of mums, she never paid attention to how I was doing at school or at home. Unsurprisingly she never bothered to attended a single parents evening throughout my time at primary school. I was being bullied everyday but never had anyone to talk to about it. You see Jonny, everyone just thinks I am strange and not worth the effort. When I got to senior school everything changed. On the morning after my 12th birthday I work up and realised I was all alone. I guess to this day that is the reason that I have been scared to share my life with anyone. I always think that when I wake up in the morning they will just not be there and I will feel that sense of abandonment all over again."

Jonny took his hand from under the table and placed in gently on top of hers before giving her the indication to continue.

"The memories of that day still stand out in my mind. I went downstairs and found a note on the countertop which just said that my mum was sorry and that she would be better off without me. And despite everything she had done to me previously I had never thought that I would be better off without her. Every young girl needs their mum but I guess I was such a terrible daughter that she just didn't want to know me. I have always put up this front of not caring about anyone but truly people do hurt me and I am not the heartless person everyone thinks I am. This technique is just something I developed when I was in care to stop the other kids from feeling sorry for me. I have always hated pity. While all this was going on in the children's home I was still being bullied at school. I lost count of the amount of times I went hungry at lunchtime because one of the older kids in my year had taken my lunch money yet again. To get around all this I focussed all of the remaining energy I had into my studies. From a very young age I always knew that I wanted to become a doctor, the reason why is simple; other people are always easier to fix."

Jonny finally realised quite how much he still had to learn about this amazing woman. He genuinely thought he knew her well, and compared to most he did. But not anybody could say they actually understood Jac fully.

"I think I went on a bit, but that's the thing you see. Once start I just get so worked up by everything that has happened in my life that I will just keep going. It's all or nothing."

"It's fine Jac, I said I wanted to understand you and now at least I think I am a few steps closer to being there, now come on we really need to leave for work now"

With that Jonny cleared away the 2 plates while Jac went to brush her teach and retrieve her coat from the wardrobe. Jonny followed her up a few minutes later and did the same. Moments later they reconvened in the hallway of Jacs flat before bracing themselves for not only the bitterly cold winter weather but the long day ahead.

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**I am going to leave it there as not only do I think I owe you guys a chapter after this long but also I want work to be a separate chapter as I feel like I should include some of the medical side too. Don't worry though there will definitely be more of these 2 as well as some of Darwins other famous faces. **

**Until next time, Becky xx**


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